Posted in A.P. Roberts, Writing 101

Writing 101: Some People Cry, Some People Clean

Written for Writing 101: Don’t Stop the Rockin’.

I had planned to use this prompt to talk about the writing process however, in light of recent events, I have decided write about my father-in-law and our grieving instead. I’m hoping that this post will be cathartic and allow me to let out some more of my grief.

I realize that some people cannot deal with death and for this reason I am putting the main post behind a cut. Consider this a trigger warning if you are triggered by death or talk of the grieving process.

My SO has been crying on and off over the last few days. He will be able to have a conversation but the moment he is left alone the tears will come. I know that he is trying to stay strong for his sisters’ sakes and for that I am very proud of him. But that doesn’t stop me from wishing he would let out all of his grief.

I suppose my SO and I are similar in that respect. He has been staying strong to support his family and I have been staying strong to support him.

I have also been cleaning. A lot. I must have cleaned each room at least twice a day since we heard the news. I’ve washed each load of laundry twice and rewashed each load of dishes as well.

When I’ve run out of things to clean, I’ve been cooking. We had the family over today to finalize funeral plans and I made sure that everyone ate something. I made snacks and full meals to feed everyone. I also made sure everyone had some type of drink whether it was tea, hot chocolate or pop.

I needed to make sure that everyone else was coping with their grief and taken care of. I needed to work through my grief in a physical manner rather than a purely emotional manner.

While we are still grieving the loss of my father-in-law and will be for awhile, I know that we are all ready to get back into the real world. We still miss him terribly and are shocked at his passing but we also know that he wouldn’t want us to put our lives on hold for him.

My father-in-law wasn’t a fan of taking years to do things. He wanted things to be done as quickly as possible. We have tried to keep to these wishes in terms of planning his funeral and memorial to occur on the same day as the flight arrives. We are also planning a memorial for his friends here in Alberta for the week after his funeral in the East Coast.

I think I’m safe to say that my father-in-law would be happy with how his family is handling his death. He would be proud of the family he raised.

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Author:

The AP Roberts is an extremely rare creature and there is only one known AP Roberts in the world. Usually off in its own little world, the AP returns to reality when it gets lonely. This elusive creature is rather difficult to catch on film, however will pose for drawings. The AP, though wild by nature, can be tamed and makes a wonderful pet. It should also be known that while the AP gets along with most creatures it has an intense fear of insects and large canines. The AP lives on a diet of mainly vegetables and candy but is not known to refuse food that is made and offered through kindness. The drink of choice for the AP is tea though it is known to drink water and juice. There is still much to be learned of the AP however, most agree that the writings of the AP are truly something to behold. Hopefully, one day the AP will find a good Agent creature who will introduce the AP's writings to a good publisher creature and the world will be able to read the AP's works.

7 thoughts on “Writing 101: Some People Cry, Some People Clean

  1. We lost my mother in law seven years ago (can it really be seven?) so I can say from experience, it gets better. A month to the day after she passed, I had a lupus flare-up that put me in bed for three days. I mention this not for sympathy, but to not that if you don’t take time to grieve, your body may make time. Talk to someone, preferably outside the situation (definitely not your SO, as he probably won’t be able to handle both his own grief and yours). If you truly feel no one is an appropriate confidante, remember God is always available. Make time to exercise-even just a short walk each day. These are the things I should have done. I’m very sorry for your family’s loss.

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    1. Thank you for your concern. My SO and I have a therapist that we talk to on a regular basis which is helping us through the grieving process. Alongside that when I clean I think. Cleaning is my version of going for a walk or meditating.

      I am very sorry that you had to deal with what you did. I will definitely try to learn from that and let my grief out naturally rather than hold it back.

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        1. I don’t know if they would like my style of cleaning. I tend to think about things other than what I’m cleaning. This results in the same thing being cleaned several times in a row, mainly laundry. I’ve been known to wash the same load of laundry four or five times because I’ve forgotten if it has been washed.

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