Abuse in Fiction: Romance

It seems like every other romance story found on the internet has aspects of abuse throughout the story. Whether this abuse is from one of the main characters to the other or from a secondary character toward a main character, the abuse is usually written in a way that makes it seem alright. In some cases the abuse is glamorized and in other cases it is glossed over as unimportant information.

This bothers me as there are many people who are victims of abuse and this abuse is neither unimportant nor glamorous.

Abuse in Fiction: Backstories

Many lazy writers attempt to create reader sympathy by saying that their main character was abused. At times these writers will include a chapter or two which involves the abuse. Unfortunately, the abuse is rarely dealt with in a healthy manner and tends to be quickly forgotten by the writer.

Words cannot describe how much this angers me.

Abuse affects people’s emotions and thought processes. Different people react differently to abuse. Different types of abuse affect people in different ways. Whether the abused realizes that the abuse affects their life or not, there are lasting effects that need to be dealt with.

If you must have your character abused in their past, make sure you include some of the side effects in their characterization.

Don’t include abuse simply because you want readers to feel sorry for your characters. Victims of abuse deserve so much better than you making light of what they have gone through. They are so strong to have come out the other end despite the scars they may carry. Please, if you include abuse, do them justice by writing it well and doing your research.

I’m not an expert on the effects of abuse and I don’t claim to be. Everything I know comes from what I’ve witnessed and through research. The following links are to some of my favourite, trusted sites that I go to when I need more information about this particular topic.

• https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/factsheets/long_term_consequences.cfm
• http://www.healthyplace.com/abuse/
• http://www.secasa.com.au/
• http://www.domesticviolenceinfo.ca/
• http://www.mentalhelp.net/poc/center_index.php?cn=2

Writing 101: Character Building Exercise

This post was written in response to Writing 101: A Character Building Experience.

 

Write a post about the most interesting person you’ve met in the past year. To be honest, I don’t feel as if I have met any one person who was more interesting than the rest. However, I have met some very interesting people who I will attempt to portray in this post.

I have met a baker who never smiles. A look at his face might give the impression of discontent and anger. However, a conversation would show the baker to be an optimist. The baker has a quick wit, which captivates listeners. To judge this baker by his looks, one might turn away and miss the chance to meet a wonderful man.

I have become better acquainted to a man who is the embodiment of strength. Despite being dependent on blood transfusions, he helps with chores and longs to return to work. In the days before a transfusion, he is sluggish but still manages to help his wife take care of the house. Every improvement is a celebrated victory and every day is an improvement.

Of course, I have also met some people who leave much to be desired. I have also met a mother who refuses to discipline her child. When her toddler bites, she laughs. If her sister is in the room, it is her sister’s job to look after the child. There is no attempt to control voice. All because she fears turning as abusive as her child’s father.

I have met a woman who is struggling against her mind. Anxiety and depression are constantly creeping into her thoughts. She has learned positive coping skills over the years but yearns for the quick fixes she once used. This woman is determined to win this daily battle with her husband’s help.

While I have met many more people in the past year, these four are the ones which come to mind as I am writing. I hope you enjoyed a glimpse into their lives, short as it was.